I had my 20-week scan this week and was pretty nervous. Everything was ok though and we wanted to find out the sex. So the sonographer paused and hovered over my tummy before shouting ‘scrotum and penis!’ to which I replied ‘is it a boy?’ ‘No…’ he said dryly, ‘of course it’s a boy’.

I also saw the obstetrician this week to discuss whether to have another c-section. I had quite a traumatic birth last time that I will write about at some point because the circumstances surrounding labour and birth do need to improve, but I thought it unwise to revisit the experience whilst I’m waiting to go through it again! I think I will try and have a natural birth and achieve a more positive experience this time around but it is scary. The obstetrician explained there are two ‘firing starters’ at the top of the womb and in first labours they both go off at the same time, but in subsequent labours one goes off first then the other, which makes contractions more efficient. Let’s hope my body plays ball! 

My husband was trying to explain distance to our toddler a while ago and as he pointed to the horizon, our toddler kept asking when he would get there. ‘But you don’t get there, that’s why it’s always in the distance.’ That’s sometimes how I feel, trying to get somewhere that is just out of reach, but learning a lot along the way.

Useful links: 

The Birth Trauma Trust, which aims to raise awareness of birth trauma and its link to perinatal wellbeing and mental health.

Maternity Matters, which focuses on the maternity experience as a whole, promoting choice and birth rights, providing a voice for mums, and supporting emotional wellbeing and self-care in pregnancy, birth and beyond.

Maternity Experience (#MatExp), a social media campaign that empowers users of maternity services to join conversations about their experiences and what really makes a difference, and getting health care professionals and local communities to listen and work in partnership with women and families to improve maternity experiences.