family · Kids · Parenting

Getting out of the house


Why is this such a fucking nightmare?

Where does the inability to put your own pants on properly but happily wear them as a hat come from?

Why has the skill of putting socks and shoes on suddenly vanished?

And brushing hair? I currently have to do this as Herbie twiddles around the kitchen table like the ex-leper from Life of Brian.

And do not talk to me about getting changed after swimming – this has reached new levels of idiocy with Gus, who now adamantly refuses to wear his towel and prefers to shut himself naked in the lockers. At this point, I’m one step away from wanting to do this myself.

I feel the pain of every parent who starts the day with good intentions but has already threatened to disown their children by 8am just to…get…out….of….the….door

Image from Pixabay


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