Health · Miscarriage · Pregnancy after loss

Heading into Christmas

So I had my dating scan this week and everything looked as it should, which was good news. I get so jittery beforehand and have to close my eyes and be told all is ok before I can open them. I explained to the sonographer about the clinical trial I was part of. I often get raised eyebrows when I talk about it to medical professionals who are not aware of the research but I hope that sharing the information helps people understand. He kindly gave us our scan photos for free when he heard our story, although he forgot to tell the receptionist – awkward. I was measuring 13 weeks, 3 days, which gives me a due date of 3rd June. My brother will be pleased as originally I was due on 7th June, his birthday, and he didn’t want to share his special day – he’s 35…

When I saw the midwife, I was put under the obstetrician because of my previous c-section and age (geriatric – delightful term) so I have an appointment with him in January, just before my next scan. We should be able to discuss birth plans and whether to have another c-section. I’m not really fussed – whatever gives the best chance of a healthy baby is the main thing. I have another midwife appointment in early January, where they will test my thyroid again as I need to continue taking the levothryroxine throughout pregnancy and then be re-evaluated.

As the scan was all ok, I was able to stop taking the progesterone, as the placenta should have taken over by now. I’m a little wobbly about this as it is like kicking a crutch away but am trying to ignore that feeling. I have helpfully developed a suspected urine infection so replaced one set of pills for another and started a course of antibiotics for that, which has made me feel like Grotbags but is only for five days. Have been trying to do what I can with Herbie but he quite often precedes a request by ‘are you going to cry, mummy’ as I burst into tears at the drop of a hat at the moment. Cue hand-wringing guilt at being an emotional wreck. 

So, I’m trying to continue thinking positively, not beat myself up about feeling vulnerable and keep the anxiety at bay, looking forward to Christmas and what 2017 holds.

Image from Pixabay

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